You type-meet, I say-meat. You want- cool, I shout-coot! I’ll fix your words ‘til nothing makes sense, then blame you for the offense.

I am a creature of the night, atruly fright'ning sight, I prowl the woods in search of prey, But when night turns to day, I shrink in size and lose my hair! And no, I don't use Nair.

face like a tree, skin like the sea, a great beast I be, yet vermin frighten me.

While my size is not standard, I’m used as a scale. I grow in the sun, though my flesh is quite pale Don’t open my hint, I’ll freely unlock it Are you happy to see me, or am I in your pocket?

I move at surprising speeds, I spread something used as a synonym for seed, I can be startling indeed, After me, a type of paper you may need.