What the grown up acorn said when it looked in a mirror

A Naval friend once told me that ships float, and ... sink, which I thought submarines were ships, but not to him.

The scarecrow was the best there was. You could say he was this in his field.

Someone ripped me off and took my coat of wool.

I was an icon in the heyday of Microsoft word whenever you needed help. But often people did not like me. Now I am relegated to holding documents and being bent out of shape to clean hard to reach places.